Married Wisdom - 1

This is the first post in the long awaited (from my end that is :D) series on marriage; and what you get to learn out of it. This is just a process of making notes along the way to serve as documentation (to me and to that rare person who thinks I'm sensible) and that being said, let's move on to the "What's not said is not understood!" chapter.

Usually, I'm a big fan of abstract expressions and implicit communication. Even in the movies, I love shots that implicitly convey something as opposed to the ones that dramatize the whole thing. Unfortunately, that's the last thing a married man should do. Until you are married, you are like a pet. Free to wander and permitted to do what you want to do, no questions asked, unless it's something incredibly stupid or irritating. The hope there is that you will return home no matter where you wander and you will be in the vicinity no matter how long you keep wandering. The moment you are married, you are expected to be responsive and responsible. Your best friend, your immediate surrounding and even your parents start believing that your life would change drastically after marriage, whether that happens to be true or not. So staying out of touch, forgetting to call, avoiding touchy-feely dialogs are strict no-nos. Unless you say "I love you" nobody is going to believe that. Unless you call, nobody is going to believe you are interested in their welfare. Unless you express, nobody is going to understand you!

So rule 1 in short, if you want to say something, say it instantly and explicitly without the the least bit of ambiguity or abstraction in it.

(To be continued... ;))

Blogging after a break!

I still remember the days when I used to wonder what good a blog could do. I mean, what's the whole point in writing some random stuff online without knowing who is going to read it or without having any kind of guarantee whatsoever that it's going to matter at all. But over the years I realized that blogging, unlike FB, Twitter or any of the "cool" trends, serves like a real vent. Even better, I have an indexed, searchable diary that tells me what I've been thinking on a specific date, with no respect to the years that might've passed in between. To a person like me, often getting lost into thoughts, this for sure is a boon and that's how I get back to blogging irrespective of the breaks that I take in between. This is kind of like a marriage - the initial days you are so expressive, never stay apart and the instinct to be with each other is overwhelming. Over the years, all the superficial things vanish; but the bonding is so strong that you kind of grow into each other.

Speaking of marriage, which is the biggest event that happened in my life quite recently, I've always contemplated and blogged over the topic in general; but nothing would be as realistic as experiencing it, right? I recently realized that I didn't ponder much over one important aspect of this social system - what it does to people. I mean, I've thought about what expectations the couple and/or the parents might be having before marriage, how important it is to ensure that all parties are happy when the couple get engaged, how important it is for the couple to stick to each other, to be flexible/understanding, etc. But the post-marital changes in people related to the couple, is a topic that I never thought of and quite honestly, that comes to me as the most surprising part. I guess I'll try to record these steps and changes and thoughts through my good old, trustworthy, faithful companion - my blog! So in case this sounded the least bit interesting, stay tuned! :)

Oh... The second year is over :)

Just when I had this spectacularly long break in blogging, I got an email from the Clustrmaps that said my map has been reset; indicating that my blog is turning 2. :-)

I've been giving a lot of thought about resuming blogging at the pace I used to; but somehow one thing or the other kept me away; leading to this predominantly dormant year. I'm just hoping to see a change this year, possibly one blog a day at least.

So what I've been up to these days? A question that people who get to know me exclusively through my blogs (trust me there are a few :D) would be having in their minds. A few quick things that I could think of...

A loooooooooot of movies

This is perhaps the first thing I would say, though there were other serious stuff going on; because of the sheer time I spare for them and the interest I have in watching more and more of them. Today for instance, I'm on my 3rd movie (Vinnai thaandi varuvaayaa, American Pie - The book of love and Theeratha vilayaattu pillai 'now running' :)) The interesting part is I've been into a lot of foreign language films as well (German, French, Spanish, Japanese, Korean, you name it :D) and the sad part about it is that most of the scenes that I enjoyed in Tamizh/Indian movies seem to be a straight lift from elsewhere which makes me sick.

A loooooooooooooot of work

Anyone in a desi consulting company would vouch for this. If you get paid a 1000 dollars you usually work for approx 2495 dollars and 35 cents :p The end of last year has been horrible at that and I've been working like crazy for 3-4 months straight. Now, I'm still working like crazy; but the better part is that I'm at a client location in a "developer"/"dev lead" role (I'm leading myself, you know :D) which kind of restricts work to office as opposed to the way it used to be before. I'm expecting another hectic season; but hopefully it wouldn't be as hectic as it used to be a couple of months back.

A loooooooooooooot of travel

I'm going to an office 15 miles from my place as opposed to the one 0.5 miles away; but that's not the only thing I'm talking about. Took a welcome break and went to India on a vacation; but the vacation was more than tiresome. 3 weeks and I just kept spinning all the way. Couldn't meet many or do much about anything. It was like around the world in 21 days :) I know some are upset that I couldn't meet them; and I'm sorry about that!

A looooooooooooooot of boredom

I've been doing quite well at work; and recently, I even got a client appreciation; but somehow it doesn't help me get over the void that is omnipresent in my life... I somehow feel I should try something different (a lot of things in queue as usual); but at the same time worried about a secure future. Typical Libran indecisiveness one could say; but it's not all that bad after all. As much as I want to do something I love, I also need to make sure that I'm not being accused of being irresponsible. Kind of working on this right now, trying to figure out some plans and arrive at a balance; but don't know how long it's going to take before my life turns into a Hindi movie (following your dreams is kind of the trend in Hindi movies these days if you didn't notice :))

So... I'm quite happy that I made it this far and authored "The Crux of My Invisible Days" and I hope I wouldn't have to write any such summaries in the future.

Time to blog...

Somehow my writing/blogging frequency has come down a lot. The script that I started almost a year back is still on hold... I don't remember the last time I came up with something creative; and I promised to give a short story to my friend which I couldn't keep up. It's not intentional or voluntary; but it just happened. When the mind doesn't hit equilibrium no matter how many years you have; you just can't think in a creative fashion.

Until December, work was my priority and then came the welcome break - my vacation. Though it was the busiest I could fathom, keeping me busy every moment and in fact cutting down my online access a lot; for the first time ever in these three years, I'm missing India so much. Somehow, being in my apartment, sitting on the same couch I sat on, a month back is now feeling strange. For the first time in two years I'm feeling lonely; but I'm in no mood to even step out of my apartment. Everything seems just so meaningless and my mind remains turbulent all through the day and even when I sleep. Simple things sound complex, everything seems to be irritating and even movies sound disinteresting! I just hope and pray that I'm out of this phase pretty soon.

Haircut special - part 3

People who have been reading my blog for a while would know about the great haircut I had back in Mississippi. I had a haircut sometime back here; but that was a typical gentleman crop where the only thing you lose is 15$ and your hair more or less remains the same :D So there was nothing so fancy about it.

But a month and a half later, my hair was back to its terrific form and pretty much resembled a bonsai when uncombed. So, after a loooooooooooong wait (I'd rather call this India special wait as I thought of having this round of haircut back in India during my vacation and in fact, I'd say I've been delaying this more or less like people who grow hair for offering in Tirupati), I finally decided to get my haircut today. Thanks to vadivelu I was smiling while actually laughing my heart out during each phase of the haircut.

Step 1: Explaining what I need

Me: I would like to have a close cut on the sides and back perhaps 2 or 1 and gradually go up to a 3 or 4 or the front, long enough to brush.

Barber (staring as if I said New Delhi is the capital of US): But that will be too short.

Me (mind voice): Idhu adhu la!

Step 2: Barber being courteous

Barber (after trimming my side burns): This is number 3. Is that ok to have it this short?

Me: Doesn't sound that bad! Yeah! (mind voice: avasarappattuttaenao)

Step 3: Mowing

Just before I realized, she shaved off a semicircle from the back of my head.

Me (thinking): Aaahaa! Kelambittaaingayyaa... Kelambittaaingayyaa... I was also reminded of this comedy where vadivelu goes to a hotel and describes how perfectly he wants his ootthappam (for about 5 mins) and the waiter says "Master oru ooooooootthaaaaappam!" in the end.

Step 4: Step cutting

This was the most hilarious phase of the haircut. With all my hair gone more or less like Sethu Vikram, She was trying to trim the hair on the sides with a comb.

Me (thinking): Yeiiiiiiii... Yenna vacchu comedy keemidi pannalayae :D

Step 5: Feedback

Barber: Everything looks ok? (with a broad smile)

Me: Of course! (sarcastic obviously!) (Thinking:) Innum motta adicchu kaadhu kutthiru. Panksan remmmmmba sirappaa nadakkum! :))

So, there I was with a horrible haircut but smiling my a** off; thanks to Vaigai puyal. But one good thing as with all these horror experiences is that I need not think about a haircut for the next couple of months.

Monologue

What time is it?
3:45 AM

Don't feel sleepy?
Yeah. But not much!

Are you sure?
Kind of... But I feel a bit sleepy too!

Then go on with your sleep!
No... I think I've slept enough. Marinara sauce and vinegar have caused a bit of acid indigestion. Perhaps I should take some Omam and water...

But, you've to brush your teeth!
Is it? Hmm... Let me think... WTF! Let's brush.

Why so yellow?
B-Complex

You look like a mess. Don't you think you need a shave?
It's 4 AM and I should get a shave? Well... why not?

Hmm... Much better. You need a haircut too!
Yeah... But couldn't get one at this hour.

So, what are you going to do now? Write a story perhaps?
Nope.

But you had a few good themes that you wanted to write on...
Yeah... But I'm in no mood for that!

Why not?
I said... NO!

Ok... Extjs?
Uff... Never!

Call someone in India? Home perhaps?
Yeah... Sounds like an idea.

But you didn't pickup your phone!
I know. Just giving it some time. I'm in a leave me alone mood now.

Go online? Orkut perhaps?
No. I don't want to stare at a computer screen now.

A Movie perhaps?
I said, No Computer!

Then what now?
I got an idea. Don't you think this conversation is worth a blog?

But you said you don't want to go online!
Did I? We can always make exceptions. Let me log into Orkut, skim through OI and VM; and then blog about this conversation.

...Silence...
You there? Did you take a look at this post in OI? Someone is having a problem with his Sambar! Should I become the sambar Samaritan now?

...Silence...
Never mind! Let me start blogging...

Birthdays... :)

I didn't change my Orkut first name, last name for a while and since it reads "Yogaesh blogs regularly", quite often people ask for the quantitative description of "regularly" :) It's indeed been a long break this time; and though I thought of writing about a lot of things - movies I saw, my workload, mood swings, thought process, etc; I never got the time and the yearning to write together. To be more precise, I got both of them a couple of times, but I used those wildcards for continuing with my script which has been on hold for a longer duration than my blog :)

Anyways, today is my birthday and thanks everyone who wished me over mail, phone and Orkut. Unlike the usual b'days where the Indian version would be an early wakeup, sandhyavandhanam, temple visit, semiya paayasam and some sweet words; and the US version would be midnight get together's that last for about an hour or so; this birthday was extremely unique. Only one of my two roomies even knew it was my b'day and I was busy with some project work at midnight. I slept only by 5:45 and that pretty much ruined the rest of my day too. Some of my regular wishers missed my b'day; but I got some pleasant surprises from a few. So it's been a quite unique b'day in a lot of ways. Despite all this, there were a couple of things that this b'day had in common with my other b'days - temple visit and thoughts. The former is nothing new and anyone who know me faintly will be aware of my theistic thoughts; so I'd rather not get into religious philosophies now :)

Coming to the second part, every b'day is a natural alarm that rings in your mind, reminding you about your age and handing over the key to the world of thoughts and retrospection. The alarm has gone off every single year and this b'day was no exception. Career, personal life, relationships, philosophies and a million other things crowd my mind and somehow my mind finds out a way to ponder over every single thought that comes up and give its judgement. My blog would become a trash can if I pour them all out... So let me not do that! :) But this time the processor was quite occupied all through the day; and let's see if these thoughts turn into any positive change :) Fingers crossed in all possible combinations... :D

Across US in two and half days...

When I first came to US, I had a stupid dream or rather a wish that I should cover all 50 states in the nation before I go back to India for good. I always wanted to do a coast to coast road trip for this purpose and time and again, I couldn't do that partly because of laziness and partly because of practical limitations. But this time, it became a necessity and though it's not technically a coast to coast drive, this 2700 miles drive did take me through a many parts of the nation I've not been to, before.

Ironically, as much as I wanted to do this trip before, I didn't really have the mind to drive all the way this time because of several reasons. First of all, I was driving my own car and I didn't want it to break down or get damaged during the long and almost continuous course. Second, unlike a trip with a group of friends (or at least one good looking girl :D) I had to travel all alone and third, I couldn't really enjoy the trip or halt at different places. I just had to rush from end to end and reach the destination by Saturday (Jul 4th) in the worst case, so that I have a day to relax before I get to work. So as much solitude lover as I am, I thought that the trip wouldn't let me enjoy it.

But the trip eventually turned out to be pretty interesting; and I took away a lot of memories from this trip. Usually I drive at very high speeds and my objective would be to cover the distance in the shortest time possible. But this time, I was averaging 80 miles may be because I'm getting older; or because I was too cautious not to add any more direct/indirect expenses because of speeding :)

Before I talk about anything else about the trip, I should definitely appreciate the US government for building such a neat transportation system. I've travelled about 2700 miles which is more than the distance between Kanyakumari and Kashmir; and this I was able to do without any sort of pre-planning. A printout of the route and I'm all set. I sincerely wish Indian roads were as organized. (Fortunately for us, we have the railways and we could really boast of our rail network :))

The drive through the North-Western states was unbelivable and the scenaries were awesome to say the least. Uploading a few photographs that I managed to click on my way... Wish I had more time to spend clicking. :)

Apart from these, a lot of thoughts/ideas were going on and off in my mind; and to recollect them all or write them in a blog would be an impossible task. But sure enough, I'd say this would be one of the most memorable trips I ever made - thanks to my stallion which was smooth as silk throughout the journey, the police department for not noticing my ocassional speeding :D and of course God for well... everything! :)

An interesting cycle...

Generally speaking, I hate being institutionalized (courtesy: The Shawshank Redemption :D). I mean, if I'm asked to do the same thing over and over again, in a fixed cycle; then it wouldn't be long before I get fed up with the system and give it up. I'm into once such cycle now but lo and behold! I find it interesting. :)

Let me try to describe the routine...

09:30 AM - Wakeup with (a complete sleepy head and) the faintest interest to do so; and get ready.

10:00 AM - Come over to office and allow the system to take a deep breath and show me the desktop in about 7 minutes and 23 seconds :D

10:07:xx AM through 11:45 AM (xx denotes variable seconds depending on my system's mood and state of mind on any given day) - Complete pending craps if any. Answer stupid questions that come up in office and once through with the whole process, sit down with gmail and orkut. Mostly, my best friends would be online and time flies away.

11:46 AM - 2:00 PM - Power lunch and if possible power nap. (Indha baadi evlo thaangum nu kanakku vacchukkura vaenaamaa naanu :p)

2:01 - 5:00 PM - Repeat the tasks listed under 10:07:xx AM through 11:45 AM. :)

5:01 PM - 6:00 PM - Short nap before the long workout.

6:01 PM - 7:00 PM - Chat with roomies, ensure schedule and get ready.

7:01 PM - 10:00 PM - Volley ball or tennis depending on whether there is a group or just a few.

10:01 PM - 10:30 PM - Get home, take a shower, complete my prayers and start cooking

10:31 PM - 11:15 PM - Cooking and setting up everything for dinner. Meanwhile, make sure a movie is buffered.

11:16 PM - 11:45 PM - Start watching the movie and eat.

11:46 PM - 12:45 AM - Continue watching the movie and have a discussion on the movie.

12:46 AM - xx:xx AM (again xx denotes variable time) - Wonder if I should sleep and stay awake until I get yes as an answer (from within :D)

Now, I know some of u might be fuming reading this schedule :D Don't worry, this won't be on for long and just like all good things come to an end, this will too and that day is not far off (a week away may be ;) :))

A quick catchup...

Memorial weekend, tennis matches and movies succeeded in keeping me away from blogging for a while and I thought I should just sum up whatever I wanted to write over the past few days.

Haircut:
People who read my blog regularly (or atleast once in a while just so the count would increase a wee bit :D) would know about my haircutting experience here. With the first hair 'mowing' effective for 3 months, I had to trim my hair again; and living in a great metro like Clinton, I had no choice but to go to the same shop again (I should get my clippers and try 'suya sevai' once). This time, I made sure I sat on a different chair; and I did succeed in dodging the big mower :D This lady, a typical red neck seemed to understand my description better; and the way she explained it (just blend it all the way to the top, etc, etc) I believed she would do a better job (nammmmmmmmbi okkaandhaen :D). Everything looked fine until the machine almost reached the centre of my head. I was thinking "aaaahaaa... Wanted a vandhu vaangaayittiyaeda" (digging my own grave); but fortunately she wasn't as dumb as the previous mower. As she set a virtual boundary almost at the center of my head and started playing around, I thought I'd end up in the infamous Beckham style; but she had some soft corner for the right side of my head. So ended up having a cap of hair at the center of my head with my left portion completely mowed and the right portion cut as I wanted it to be. Hmmm... At least I was 50% close to what I wanted. :)

A trip to Arkansas:
Long weekend usually means a trip; and memorial day weekend was not an exception. We were out to the nature state on road and pretty much covered all of Arkansas. Needless to say I took a lot of photographs and I'm trying my hand on post processing now. One of the them turned really well... A pic that looked so ordinary appears exceptional now. Let's see how it goes. Highlights of the trip -
1. Met my friend Karthik after a long time, 2. Rode a boat :) Not a hand motor boat; but a pontoon with a steering wheel. That was fun to say the least, 3. Visited some excellent spots. Usually, we would be going in search of such spots. But the whole Ozark area was splendid when it came to the view points and scenaries. In short, enjoyed the trip. :)

Some movies:
Saw quite a few movies over the past few days... New roomie being a gulte, I was catching up with a few Telugu movies too. Of the ones I watched, I liked Sarvam. It's not an exceptional movie or something; but the concept behind the movie (butterfly effect) was awesome; and it's definitely worth a watch. Newtonin moondraam vidhi was also good; but one should forget logical aspects to watch the movie.

That's all we have for now... Stay tuned as we come back with more updates shortly. (Itthudan indha seidhi arikkai niravadaigiradhu :D)

25 Random things about me...

I joined the facebook network (once again?!) recently; and the last time I joined it, I hardly did anything with my profile. This time, I was taking a tour around the site; and landed upon this interesting concept... Writing down 25 random things about oneself. Can be anything... The only rule being there should be 25 different things in there. I gave it a shot and here is what I came up with...

1. I'm a perfect example of a Libran. I have seen quite a lot of differences among my friends who belong to the same sun sign, but nonetheless the Linda Goodman definition of a Libran would be at least 95% accurate in my case.

2. I was named Yogesh and continued to be Yogesh till my high school. Namology changed my name to Yogaesh... If you ask me whether it made a difference or not, I'd say it did... At least my name became unique :D

3. I'm pretty much a mirror when it comes to relationships and people. What you see in me is what you want to see in me.

4. I'm a big fan of movies and I can watch movies non-stop as long as the list is good. Given a choice, I prefer Tamil movies for the simple fact that I grew up with them. But I watch a lot of movies in English, Hindi and Telugu as well. I avoid watching movies in languages that I don't comprehend, purely because I don't want to miss the emotions that the words and the dialog delivery convey.

5. I like superstar a lot and nothing could match the excitement of watching a superstar movie FDFS (First Day First Show) with die-hard fans. You could hardly follow the movie; but the ambiance is just unbeatable.

6. I hate people who talk about the unknowns just for the heck of it. I'd love to learn things that interest me; and I wouldn't mind listening to a well informed person. But talking some crap just to show off; irritates me big time.

7. I can alternate between an extreme introvert and an extreme extrovert; depending completely on the people I am with. I can easily socialize with people whom I can connect to quite easily; and vice versa.

8. I'm a strict vegetarian (lacto-vegetarian; not Vegan) by chance and choice. I'm an ardent fan of South Indian food and rice has to be there in my diet; one way or the other :D

9. Logic and art are the two most interesting things to me; and just as those two topics are miles apart, my interests are also diversified. To put in a short list from the top of my head it would be Movies, Psychology, Writing, Philosophy, Poetry, Politics, Programming, Management, Religion and Photography.

10. I'm not a calculative person when it comes to money; and I have failed being calculative despite conscious efforts. At the same time I'm not a spend-thrift either :D

11. I love a laid back life; but I can put in whatever it takes to work towards my goal if I really believe that's what I need.

12. Loyalty is what matters the most to me - both ways!

13. I cannot say 'No'. That is the worst weakness and the greatest strength in me!

14. I hate hurting others and like-wise I hate people who make sharp comments without bothering about the other person's feelings.

15. I'm extremely frank and except for occasions where truth will hurt the other party, I don't lie.

16. I've never copied in a test at least after my high school. Not that I'm a gem of a person or that I'm Harichandra's reincarnation. But it just felt so pointless. :)

17. I believe in looking at a person as a whole than judging him/her based on one of his/her traits. For the same reason, I love Hitler for his virtues, though I hate him for being inhuman to the jews.

18. I usually smile when I speak; and use :) or :D most of the time when I chat/write something in online forums.

19. I love level-headed people and I'll try my best to be who I am, irrespective of what I am. Infact that's something I love the most in superstar. :)

20. Sports and physical activities have always been a distant relative to me. We hardly meet; and when we do, we get along decently well.

21. I used to follow cricket until the match fixing scandal came up. Ever since then, I gave up even watching cricket and these days I feel it's becoming the biggest business in India rather than a sport.

22. I'm more or less addicted to internet and I could hardly imagine a day completely offline; unless it's an extremely busy day or a day spent traveling. On an average day, I spend at least 10 hours online.

23. I love humor (or humour if I should go by the spelling I learned at school) and that is usually reflected in my speech and interests.

24. I don't change myself as long as I'm convinced that I'm not wrong; no matter what it costs me.

25. Everything is just so elaborate when it comes to my thoughts, dreams and visualizations. I can feel the drizzle if I think of a hill station; and I can describe my dream girl from head to toe! :D This helps me with my story writing stuff; though people would find it hard to accept that my stories even qualify to be called stories, to begin with! :D

People who read my blog posts quite regularly (assuming there are a few) would know at least some of these... But nonetheless, I felt this list just had to be here. :) If you blog too, try giving this list a shot; and I'm sure it'd be a different experience both to you and the reader.

Kutthunga ejamaan kutthunga... :)

Haircutting in US has always been a hilarious experience (except that I end up getting my top damaged :D); and today I saw the heights of it. The principle behind a haircut has always been the same with me - spend minimal money, get maximum hair cut and look handsome (I know this is a fantasy; but that is what fantasies are about, isn't it :)). Unfortunately, it is always a choice between 1 and 2 (3 being an obvious impractical choice); and today was the best (or should I say the worst) of all my experiences.

Ok... let me narrate it. I went to a barber shop earlier today and it was moderately sized with three members working in it... I believe they all belong to a family. A couple of them were busy with other customers and there was this enormously fat lady who came to us (there was another guy waiting before me) and asked if she could help us. The other guy instantly declined and said that he is waiting for another barber to get done with his current customer. For the briefest of moments I thought "Aahaa... Thelivaa escape aayittaanae... Villangam edhaavadhu irukkumao? (Is this a trap)" and immediately dropped the pessimistic thought considering the fact that my haircut is pretty straightforward and anyone with the least bit of experience would consider it a cake walk. I settled down and told her 1 on the sides and the back; and 3 on the front (the heights of standardizing things... Out here the haricuts are numbered from 1 through 5; where 1 means a cut that reveals your scalp through the diffractions on the left over hair; and 5 means you pay the barber unnecessarily). In my place this style is quite common and people say "Munnaadi mattum vaarra alavukku mudi irukkattumne... Pinnadi side ellaam nallaa close a edutthu 'paa'naa adicchurunga" :D

Then the great show started. The trimming machine started to take weird turns on my scalp and at one point, she was rolling the chair and holding the machine just so it avoids the heavy, time consuming movement of her pillars err legs. I was reminded of the vadivelu comedy in thalainagaram where he says "Rolling a po..." :D Half way through the battle, ceasefire was announced through a phone call; and our cannon ball took 10 full minutes to just note down the name of the person who called... Come on... she has to move, attend the call, come back, pick the register and then note the name on it. The sight of my hair at that moment almost gave me a heart attack. The machine had played kabbadi on my scalp and like an uninhabited, unmaintained valley it was full of crests and troughs of hair. At that point, the damage was already done and there was no way I could ask her to get back the lost hair. So I thought what the heck, let's see what she is upto.

After the 10 minutes ceasefire, the battle resumed and this time scissors formed alliance with the machine and the battle became fierce. I was thinking "Adaengappaa... Anga enna irukku nu ekuipment ellaam maatthi try pannra (what is left over to show your versatility)". The whole thing was crowned by the finishing touch. Remember I said 3 on the front... So she left out a small strand of hair in the front (when I say front, I mean exactly the front - just the narrow streak that falls on your face when you pull down your hair on your face) and I was literally having a 'kudumi' in the front. :D The best part was, she asked me "Is everything fine?" and she honestly thought this is what I wanted. I was reminded of many comedy scenes, the top one being the Koundamani comedy from Gentleman where he says "Pottlam otta sonnaa okkaandhu otta paottu kondu vandhurukkaan paaru... Idhu rejetted" :)) Controlling my laughter and a bit of disappointment, I said "please make it even" and she gave the final touch of cutting down the last few long hairs left. In 20 minutes, I was transformed from first half Sethu to second half Sethu; and I paid 7$ for the quick service and 1$ tip for her attitude to work despite the extreme difficulty in moving her Yokozuna body.

The worst damage came from a couple of my colleagues. One asked me "Did you pay someone for this? Come on I would've given you my clippers" and another stared at me for about 3 minutes with complete shock on his face and then said "Worstu haircut". Before I could even respond, he left the place. :)) The first time I cut my hair in the US, I asked for 'army cut' and it was my fault to have uttered those two words. But today, I was cautious enough to give the instruction that gave me decent haircuts in the past... But as luck would have it, I ended up in a haircut worser than my first haircut and isn't it the right time to say "Kutthunga ejamaan kutthunga... Indha Amerikka kaaraingalae ippidi dhaan..." :))

Why are people so complex?

Many a times, human behaviors puzzle us big time and sometimes the puzzle can leave you hurt too. Today, I experienced one such puzzle and though I've learnt things like these in the hard way over the past several years, I never expected this one to blow up to this magnitude and come back to me.

When people complicate trivial things, blow things up out of proportions and cause problems out of it, the chain continues and in the end, the persons actually concerned would be happy and smiling again; while the hurt they started would've gone in cycles and hampered a relationship elsewhere. The last thing I want is to be a part of one such cycle; but today's incident came pretty close.

I'm sure that the concerned person reading this would understand what I'm talking about and maappi, though this happened to be out of my control and I hardly expected this to happen, my sincere apologies for embarrassing you!!!

No idea...

A continuation of the F section memories I should say; and this one was one of the trademarks of the class! :)

Almost everyone who completed college would have an idea on how lecturers reprimand the students when they are not attentive in the class; and the most popular trick is to ask questions on the subject and when the student couldn't answer, they start giving advices that are no longer connected to the subject. Depending on the age of the lecturer, the tone would differ and let me try to give you a few examples...

A lecturer in late twenties through mid thrities - "Don't try to act smart. It'll take you nowhere. All this might sound funny. But you know for a fact that I control your internal marks... So better beware"

A lecturer in forties - "Kids these days hardly have any respect. When you face life, you would know how tough it is and not a day will go by without you repenting for these bad things and lack of attention in your college life"

An even older lecturer/professor - "When you look at life from your perspective it might sound too easy and careless. But when you cross ages and gain experiences you would know how tough it is to survive in the never ending competition. Professors are not your enemies. They are like the light that takes you to the............(continues until the bell rings)"

We had a physics lecturer who was (I believe) in the second category and we had nick-named her "Simran"! Somehow her way of teaching would remind me of my high school physics lessons and I hardly remember a word of what she taught us... Actually we had two physics lecturers and the other person was nick named "Nambiyar" since he always had that villain look on his face and his dialog delivery was typically like that; but he used to escape from our direct insults because he hardly cares about what students think or do during his sessions. Ocassionally he used to say "If you wand to talku, you can get outu"... That's all! So there was a gentleman (?!) agreement between us that neither of us would disturb each other...

Coming back to Miss. (Now Mrs?!) Simran, she was particular in making sure that everyone listened to what she taught and as a result, during the initial days she resorted to the text book approach of questioning the defaulters about some crappy formulae or integral equations. Just like anti-bodies that come up with some defense mechanism for every known attack, we formulated a way of tackling such things - the "No idea" scheme. The basic concept of being an anti-social element is simple. You always need to be united as a group... We all knew that the college wouldn't go too far to debar the whole class considering the scores we had (despite all our misbehaviors our average score was way higher than the averages of other sections) and that the management wasn't too stupid/sensitive to debar a class for these minor misbehaviors. If you are an individual, the situation drastically changes to adversity though! :)

The idea we formulated was simple. If someone is pointed out for mischief and asked to getup to answer a question, the person should say "No idea" even before the question was asked and even better, the next guy will voluntarily wakeup and say the same. This would continue till either the whole class is standing or the lecturer loses patience and either leaves our hall angrily or asks us all to GFO. The first day we implemented this idea, we were all ROTFL ing after the session and Ms. Simran was literally clueless about what was going on! Believe me... As arrogant as it sounds, it is one of the best memories we share and the contagious spirit with which we used to say "No idea" still lingers in my ears. Though we were rebels, the extent of unity we had was unbelievable and I could hardly imagine another class that could've possibly done the same thing. :)

'F' section...

Disclaimer: The 'F' in title is no way connected to the 'F' word... :)

Films and books tend to exaggerate college life way more than what it actually is, but sure enough it's one of the best phases of life. Unlike the kids in US or any other western countries, Indian kids enjoy the most comfortable phase of their life at college (though they never realize it when they were actually in that phase :)) because they are not bullied like the school days or forced to make money like the later stages of life. When I think about my college days looking at an email from a good old friend or holding a cup of coffee during a break, lost in thoughts; I often feel I could've lived it better... I haven't even talked with everyone (especially girls) in my class! :) I got some good friends, gained some exposure and had my share of fun during the later years but the best part of it was definitely the first semester... We were in the 'F' section when the college was adjusting to the expansion and we had weird timings (some days our classes started at 10:30 and went up to 6:30 while some other days, they begin at 8:00 and end at 3:00) that left the management with no choice to move people using the college transportation into one class. During this relocation stuff, it so happened that 'F' section was full of guys because all girls wanted to use the college transportation... It was like a demonstration of how bad a class can be to the lecturers and how good a class can be, for the guys. Among the whistles, claps, 'proxies', hilarious comments and spoofs, if I say, we enjoyed the semester, it would be an understatement...

I couldn't list out all the incidents at a stretch in a single post but let me tell you the most hilarious (most insulting from the lecturer's view point and I personally felt bad about it too) incident that happened towards the end of the semester... We had an English lecturer called Mr. Sadasivam who was a very soft person and his voice reflected it too. Imagine an English class where the lecturer delivers monotonous mumbles! Naturally, the guys enjoyed spoiling the sessions; and most of the guys wouldn't even turn up to the class. On that day, there were just 20 or 25 guys in the class whose full strength is about 70; and as usual our lecturer was mumbling something about English grammar. The guys started off their part - clapping hands for some statements made, laughing too long when the lecturer tried to be humorous, et al. Towards the end of the session, the lecturer made a note of the attendance and with the same person repeating 'Yes sir' and 'Present sir' over 5 or 6 times, the register showed just two absentees when there were about 50 persons absent... I mean, the whole class was blank and the register was brimming with attendance :D

So he said "You people are giving proxies" (clap... clap... clap) "I don't mind that at all." (Clap... clap... clap) "All I'm asking is don't stay in my class and disturb it. I'm not here to tame animals" (Clap... clap... clap). He took a long pause and said "I'm calling you animals indirectly and still you don't understand" and the guys started clapping once again! That's it... He was never seen in our class once again! We heard that he was supposed to handle the second semester English sessions for us; but he declined to teach us again... Though I feel he could've handled the sessions better, I think we overreacted, considering the type of person he is. But still, I couldn't control my laugh everytime I think about the incident.

Childhood memories...

Childhood memories are perhaps the best treasures a man carries across his life; and the moment we start thinking about the good old days, we start feeling young at heart and that feeling is just priceless... I believe this is true with anybody except if your childhood happened to be as horrible as Kaadhal kondaen Dhanush or something... :)

The first thing that comes to my mind when I think of my childhood is the 'without' travels. People from Tamilnadu should be understanding what 'without' means but if you are not aware of the term, it means traveling without a ticket in a bus or a train or anything that expects you to have one. :) I've done quite a lot of that during my school days especially the high school days. Ever since my VII or VIII stds, I've been traveling around in my bicycle and towards the end of my schooling till date, bike has been my companion; but even before the days of my bicycle, I used to travel a lot in the PRC buses (the TNSTC buses as they are called now). The tickets from my home to the school used to be One rupee and ten paise back then, and my pocket money was 2 rupees per day... :) The first day of the week my dad gave me 5 rupees and I was supposed to roll over the balances to maintain the 20 paise deficit per day and my favorite way of rolling up better sums was a 'without' travel. Frozen milk coloquially termed '1 roovaa pepsi' (Small traders give a damn about copyrights :D) was extremely popular those days and I used to spend one rupee per day (at least) to get my favorite chocolate flavored 'pepsi' and that means my one way trip is already destined to be a 'without' trip. :) Sometimes the pepsi count may become two which means the next morning's travel was also added to the list of classics...

There was a guy called Sundarrajan who used to stay near my place and we used to run a contest on who does the maximum 'without' travels in a month; and the pride of winning and the taste of 'pepsi' had me going for years in the trade... "I have a pass annaa", "I've already taken the ticket" and a lot of other ready made replies combined with an innocent look (seriously I was looking innocent back then) usually got me out of any troubles even if the conductor asks for a ticket.

This was going on for quite a few days (or should I say years :D) until the D-day came... It was another day in the contest between me and Sundarrajan and the day's credit were shared equally or almost equally until we got down... Just when we were about to get down, the conductor asked "Show me your tickets..." to both of us. As luck would have it, he was already two steps down the stairs and I was just about to get down the stairs... So the moment the conductor asked for the ticket, the guy jumped off and ran like crazy... Obviously I didn't have that luxury and I clearly knew that the conductor was not someone who is going to buy my 'pass' or 'already got the ticket' stuff. So I did the most foolish thing I could've done at the moment... I pulled out 1 rupee and 10 paise from my pocket and I said, "I forgot to buy the ticket. Could you please give me a ticket from SS colony to simmakkal" (there were like 12 stops inbetween... Moreover the bus was more or less empty and on top of it the bus was at the simmakkal stop :D)... The look on the conductor's face and the advice he gave for the next 15 mins can never be forgotten and it sure was an embarrassing moment back then. But whenever I think of the incident, I smile at my 'brilliant' idea and I couldn't resist smiling... :D

P.S: Even after that incident, I was travelling 'without' for a while (naangallaam...). As much as I smile at the 'without' travels, I wish I didn't do so. These days, even if I'm not even obligated to get a ticket, I walk up to the conductor and make sure I pay for it!

It's time for a renewal... :)

December 31... A day that has got the specialty that no other day (arguably) has - it is considered the moment we prepare ourselves for a renewal, a change, a new beginning... We make resolutions (that we most often break in the meantime ;)) and give serious thoughts about ourselves and what we expect out of the upcoming year. So this day definitely deserves a special note and when I just close my eyes and try to think what I expect from 2009, a few general and a lot of personal wishes haunted my mind and I'll try to summarize the wishes that I could share with everyone...

Peace:

Man has come far from this. But I at least wish the year has no terrorist attacks and that no human life is lost for the sake of establishing one's supremacy over the other.

A positive change in the Indian politics:

Elections are fast approaching... Let me hope that this year marks the beginning of the journey towards good; and let me pray and hope that the situation changes positively in my country.

Minimal hurt:

I wish I don't end up hurting anyone in anyway in 2009.

To be of help:

I hope I could be of help to as many as possible in any possible way - financial, emotional, personal and otherwise...

To focus more on my interests:

I hope I could spend some more time on my interests and shape up my skills for a better tomorrow.

To catch up with people:

I hope I can get back in touch with all the good souls I ever knew... Due to my inherent nature, I'm content with the feeling of someone being there for me; and at times, the other person might mistake this for indifference. Let me try to patch up these differences as much as I can.

To maintain a journal:

Writing a diary has always been my interest. But I never got into the habit... Perhaps I can do something about it this year...

Balance of work and personal life:

Of late, I'm improving on this one but let me hope I could bring in the clear demarcation this year...

Fitness and good health:

I'm no way close to a fitness freak and I still don't believe in looking at the calorie chart behind every food item. But in general, I feel I should bring my body to the right shape and I hope I could do something about it this year.

Enjoy my (possibly) last year of bachelorhood:

Even though there is absolutely nothing going on at this moment about my marriage, 2009 perhaps might be the last year of my life as a bachelor. 27 might be the magic number and if it is, then 2009 would be my last buddy! :D Whatever it is, why take chances? Let's enjoy 2009 and rock the place! :)

Wish you all a splendid New Year! :)

Traffic jam!

I'd been going around places over the past few days and too many things caught my attention, resulting in a complete traffic jam on my top floor. Let me try to throw some light on the top 3 topics so that it gets freed up a bit.

Poverty in US:

I'd once blogged about how old people run shops in Florida to win their bread and I've seen drunkards sitting by the roadside with some cardboard that says they need help/they are homeless, etc; but for the first time I saw a kind of poverty that really reminded me of Diwali times in India. Anyone who grew up in India, specifically in Tamilnadu would know how poor families struggle to put up smiling faces on the festive day. When some guys get crackers for about 10 grands, this poor father will be taking his son to the busiest street in the city/town with a few hundred bucks in his pocket and a few tons of heaviness in his heart; and he'll fake a smile and get him loads of cheap stuff that would create an illusion of excess to the kid. I saw the Americanized version of that poverty yesterday when I was renting a car. The African American guy had three daughters and he would be in his middle ages, perhaps 40 if my guess is right; and he had come over with his family for the holidays. He was trying hard to put up a smile but duplicate seals could be seen all over it. The girls were constantly complaining about something and he was telling the rental car agent about the nasty trip they had just to save some money. I was almost done with my paper work and just when I was about to start with the GPS that I had rented along with the car, he rested his glowing eyes on it and asked the agent "Is that a GPS?". The agent promptly tried to make business out of it and asked "Yes. Would you like to get one too?". With a dejected smile, yearning heart and a mind fighting to conceal his emotions, he said "No thanks! We know where we are going" in a shaky voice; and at that moment he almost caught me in tears.

Seven pounds:

After a really long time, a movie that I watched in a theater made me feel happy to have chosen it. Seven pounds is an amazingly simple, yet touching story that really creates an impact in us. Except for the never changing reaction of Will Smith, everything about the movie was awesome; and I'd say it's a must watch movie. The scenes where an old lady explains her sufferings to Will and the scenes where Will uncontrollably falls in love; were simply beautiful. A special mention has to be given to the cameraman who has done an excellent job in composing the shots. The irony is that me and my friend went to the night show around 10 PM and it was funny and interesting to see the restlessness in my friend when trying hard not to sleep :)

It's pay time:

2 months of vacation and almost 2 months of pay-lessness... At last I'm back into a job and I hope and pray this one goes well.

Mixed opinions!

Inspired by a couple of real life incidents (not in mine), I decided to write a story a couple of days back; and being a Sujatha fan who loved the "Amudham" story that he wrote for Kannathil Mutthamittal, I thought I should be writing such a short, one page story that has a comparatively similar writing style. This is what I came up with...

மூடிய கதவு

மறையத்தொடங்கிய ஆதவனின் பொன்னிறக்கதிர்கள் முயன்றும் நுழைய முடியா இருட்டறையில் இருண்ட நெஞ்சமொன்றும் இருப்பதன் அறிகுறியாய் ஓர் அழுகைக்குரல். மூடிய கதவும், இருள் சூழும் இருளும், முட்டித்தெறித்த கதறலும் அப்பாவையின் வலி உயிர் வரை ஆழ்ந்திருப்பதை உணர்த்தின. முப்பது வயது தாண்டியும், முடிகளில் சில வெள்ளிகள் முளைத்தும் மனைவியாகி முழுமை பெறாத முதிர்கன்னியின் மனச்சுமையை சமுதாயம் ஏனோ புறக்கணித்தே விடுகிறது. காதலித்தவனை காரணங்கண்டு பிரிய வைத்து, காரணத்தின் காரணமாகி, நம்பிக்கையை இழக்க வைத்து, ஆயிரம் பேர் சுற்றத்திலும் தனிமைச்சிறையில் அடைய வைத்து கை கொட்டிச்சிரிப்பதும் ஏனோ அதன் பண்பாடும் ஆகிப்போனது. ஆண் போல் இருப்பதாய், அழகிற்குறைவதாய் ஆயிரமாயிரம் காரணம் கேட்டு தன்னையே வெறுத்தவளின், வெறுப்பவளின் வேதனை பொங்கும் வாழ்கையை வார்த்தைகளால் விவரித்து விட முடியாது.

இருளும் இன்னலும் மட்டுமே நிறைந்த அத்தருணத்தை இரவிற்பூத்த மின்னல் கொடியாய்க்கலைத்தது சிணுங்கிய அவள் கைத்தொலைபேசி. கண்ணீர்த்துளி வழியே அழைப்பவன் பெயர் மங்கித்தெரிய மனதை இறுக்கி மூடி வாய் திறந்தாள். இதயத்தரையில் இருந்து அவன் மேல் ஈர்ப்பிருந்தும் இன்முகம் காட்ட ஏனோ இயலவில்லை அவளுக்கு. பயம் - தன்னையே நம்ப மறுக்கும், வாழ்க்கையில் தடுமாறித்தோற்ற, தனிமைப்பட்ட, தனித்து விடப்பட்ட ஒரு தாரகைக்கே உண்டான பயம். பல முறை உடைக்கப்பட்டு ஒட்டப்பெற்ற நெஞ்சம், மற்றுமோர் விரிசல் தாங்காதெனும் கலவரம். தனித்தும் தோற்க்கக்கூடாதெனும் அவள் வைராக்கியம் ஏனோ சில நிமிடங்கள் கூட நிலைக்கவில்லை. அன்பை வார்த்தைகளாக்கி, அரவணைப்பை வாக்கியங்களாக்கி, தாய்ப்பாலின் நேர்மையுடன் "எனை மணந்து கொள்வாயா?" என ஏக்கமாய்க்கேட்ட அவன் குரல் திறந்தது மூடிய அவள் அறைக்கதவை மட்டுமல்ல, மூடப்பட்ட அவள் மனக்கதவையும் தான்.

As my own critic, I actually liked this story a lot especially considering the target I had in my mind. I thought I played with the right words to create the impact in the reader; and I forwarded this to a few of my friends for review and comments. To my surprise, this one got the credit that none of my previous works got - the opinion was greatly mixed up ranging from "I got goose pimples reading the last few lines... Awesome would be an understatement" to "Is this what you call a story? It's just a maze of complex, round about words". I was seriously baffled by the variations in taste and somehow I found it hard to digest such a level of diversity within a very small sample that I chose.

Some amount of thought behind the comments just made me realize one undeniable fact - "Tamizhini mellacchaagum". Almost all of the recepients of this story are Tamizhians - born and brought-up in Tamilnadu. But still, almost 85-90% of them were not able to follow the content fully; because their Tamizh was not up to the mark. I don't blame the readers and I completely understand how infrequently we use written Tamizh these days. But even after I understand the reason behind it, it's hard to believe that the number of people who can fluently read and write good Tamizh (need not be the puranaanooru style Tamizh... just a proper Tamizh prose) is reducing drastically. In the next generations, this is even sparse considering the ratio of parents who put their kids into French and Hindi classes right from elementary school. I don't know if the so-called Tamizh protectors have something to do about this!!

The second part of it is the Tamizh that we cultivate. I'm not against the Pudhu kavidhai form of Tamizh poems and I do agree that the reader should understand what the poet is trying to say. But ever since the emergence of Pudhu Kavidhai in which only the concept matters, prose has become poetry and corrupted Tamizh has become prose. In other words, if I write one proper sentence in Tamizh and break it into three lines, it is considered a poetry these days. No wonder many of them told me "This is so poetic for a short story". If that is the case with poetry, prose has worsened into absolute colloquial language which is much simpler to understand but almost completely different from the actual Tamizh. Take any Tamizh magazines... the stories published would be of this sort... characters speak slang and the rest of the sentences are made too simple. Unfortunately, this has made readers shun away from well written Tamizh and when there is a story written using some expressive words, it becomes legacy, untouched and taboo. In one simple sentence, readers don't expect anything more than spoken Tamizh in the written form. Taking my own work as an example, I'm sure it isn't 'bad' but I did get comments that called it complete pointless crap and that understanding this level of Tamizh is an overhead to the reader. I'm not a Kalki or Kambar or Bharathi to use the mightiest and the most perfect Tamizh word to be used in a context; but even with my level of Tamizh (the last time I actually studied Tamizh was in my seventh grade), people say it's too much for the reader to take. Will this situation change for the better? GOK!

P.S: I feel it's hightime to start my Tamizh blog and I believe I'd be starting it pretty soon... :)

Subtitles...

I've been in the company guest house over a month now and only yesterday did I find that someone has left a collection of about 50 Hindi DVDs... Readily available DVDs mean lesser search time, need not worry about the quality of print online (I know Vinayak would be furious to hear this ;) :)), limited options to choose from and quick turn around times :D :D

Fortunately, I'm not a big Hindi movie freak and I'm one of those doubly-refined Madurai products, who never learned Hindi, never had too many Hindi speaking friends and who hardly sees any Hindi movies. These days, I've started watching Hindi movies in equal numbers; but my yet-to-be-seen list includes some of the most famous movies like Hum Aap Ki Hein Kaun; and as a result, out of the 50+ DVDs, there aren't too many previously watched movies. Actually, the week started with latest Hindi movies like Das Vidhaniya, Dostana and A Wednesday; and with this new DVD pack, I believe the 'Zee TV Vaaram' would continue for the next few weeks.

The best part about the whole thing are the subtitles. Given my ghindhi prowess, I always turn on subtitles just so I don't get lost when the characters start using uncommon words to make us believe that they are emotionally affected. Some of these subtitles really get me ROTFL. An example that hit my eyes from "Chori Chori Chupke Chupke" that I watched today...

(In the interest of people who know Hindi, I'll present the conversations in English :D)
Rani Muk: You can think of me as your sister. I'll tell my family about the whole thing and you can stay here.
Preethi: I'm happy to get a sister. But I don't want to share my sister's husband and make my sister feel bad. (Exact words used Behen and Soutan)

Subtitle: I don't want to be your co-wife :D :D